After Your Baby is Born
How Others Can Assist New Parents & How to Ask for Help
Planning ahead for help and then asking for specifics once home with a
new baby is very important. The first days and weeks in a “new baby
household” can be pretty crazy.
To help yourself get through this time, keep in mind:
- This is not a time to try to be a supermom or superdad with a spotless
house and homemade snacks ready for you to serve your guests.
- You don’t need to entertain your visitors while they rock or care
for the baby.
- You don’t need them to care for the baby for you (you may need to
be very clear about this with “helpers”), but you might appreciate
them holding and cuddling the “just fed” little one while
you enjoy a shower or relax and eat without holding the baby in your lap.
You need time as a family to settle in with baby care and feeding, and
as a new mother, you need rest to physically recover from childbirth.
Learn more about breastfeeding and your choices for feeding your baby.
Family and friends will come to visit. They will congratulate you and
admire the new baby. Remember, household chores such as shopping, cooking
and cleaning still need to be done. Be ready with a list so when someone
asks what they can do to help, you are ready to speak up.
Chores Family & Friends Can Handle
Laundry: New babies contribute several loads a day. Visitors can easily throw
a load into the washer or dryer and fold when the buzzer sounds.
Food: Keep a running shopping list so you can tell others what they can pick
up for you. Let them know that a casserole or a dessert is always appreciated.
They can even make mom a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or iced tea
while she’s nursing the baby. New moms are hungry but rarely have
time or energy to cook.
Cleaning: Houses continue to gather dust and dirt despite the presence of the new
baby. Having someone vacuum the carpet, shake out scatter rugs or wet
mop the floor is a tremendous help, not to mention helping mom continue
to heal properly. These are the very things new mothers should NOT be
Errands: Allow people to pick things up on the way over or run out to do what
is needed. Trying to get yourself and a new baby to the grocery store
for just a bread and milk can take two or more hours.
Work: From mowing to weeding to planting some of the flowers you’ve received,
yard work can be endless, especially when you are busy with yourselves
and baby. Ask new grandparents, uncles or cousins for help. Often this
is a perfect match.
Children: An afternoon or evening out with family friends or relatives can be a
treat for them and a big help to you: time for a good nap or long shower.
Learn more about how you can
prepare your child for when the new baby comes.
Gifts: If someone asks what you want or need, and you already have all of the
baby clothes you can use, ask for a day of house-cleaning service, a carry-out
restaurant dinner certificate, or a gift card for on-going baby necessities
like diapers. Any of these will also give you the gift of time to rest
and enjoy your new baby.
Learn more about our maternity centers in
St. Mary's and